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Happy Birthday to Me — A Day Late and A Week Early

Thursday 05/26/2005 1:57 PM

So yesterday was my birthday. Worked mostly. Candy and I will be celebrating this weekend.

The best part of my birthday happened last week on Wednesday, May 18th. It's about 8 o'clock at nite and the phone rings. I check the caller ID before answering (damn those solicitors!) and see that it's Candy's dad, George. Candy and I are in her Closet (our name for the spare bedroom dedicated to all things Candy) and I tell her it's her dad. She smiles at me as I click the Talk button (or whatever it's called) and say, "Hello there." George is indeed on the phone and he asks me how everything is going. I tell him, "just fine," and then I ask him if my favorite girl is around. He says she says is and puts Grandma on the phone.

Next thing I know, Grandma is singing Happy Birthday to You (©1935 Time Warner) to me with George and his new bride Shirley chiming in in the background.

Well, this is a bit puzzling and I'm wondering who's birthday it is. I'm running through everyone in Candy's side of the family trying to remember which of them has a birthday in May, but the only one I can think of is one of my nephews and he isn't even on the phone with us.

As I stand there just listening to them with a puzzled look on my face, Candy starts to grow concerned. I whisper to her, "Everything's fine. They're singing Happy Birthday to me." Then it hits me.

Candy is stifling a laugh and, as they finish, Grandma starts apologizing to me. "Peter, I am so sorry I forgot your birthday yesterday. I just got so busy and plum forgot about it."

It's all I can do to keep from busting out, but I suck it up and console her, "Grandma, it's OK that you forgot. I just appreciate you calling me today to wish me a happy birthday."

Candy falls out of her chair in a fit of laughter.

Grandma asks me how my birthday was and I tell her it was great.

"You didn't work too hard yesterday did you?" she asks.

"No, Grandma, I took the day off and enjoyed a nice birthday."

Back in her easy chair again, Candy is covering her mouth so Grandma can't hear her laughing in the background.

I ask Grandma what she's been up to and she tells me about the weather, her garden and various things. She apologizes again for calling me a day late for my birthday and I tell her, "Grandma, it's OK that you called a day late. You know what? You could have called me a week later and still it would have been great."

At that point, I can't hold it in any longer and force the phone on Candy as I fall down on the floor in convulsions of laughter that make my head hurt.

The headache lasted for another hour or so, but that was by far the best present of the year.


Back to the cemeteries for a moment.

Your Link of the Day is this great web site that Neil Gaiman mentioned on his blog yesterday. The page is filled with pictures from run-down, abandoned and otherwise derelicted cemeteries and churchyards.

In a word, awesome.

Link of the Day: Derelict London: Cemetery and Churchyards

File Under: Birthday; Cemeteries; Grandma; Link of the Day
Music: Cliff Martinez "Solaris Soundtrack"

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